The Kids Aren't Alright

I know this is a music Blog, but before I start this week’s much anticipated instalment of musical drivel, I would just like to say a few words about a certain football match in Rome the other day. I’d particularly like to say a massive congratulations to Pep Guardiola and his Barcelona team for one of the finest footballing performances I have ever had the pleasure to watch in my entire life. Utterly utterly stunning flowing fluid-like football from the likes of Xavi, Iniesta and the quite magnificently amazing Leo Messi. As for the team they beat = I have absolutely fuck all to say apart form …. Aaaaaaaaaaagggggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!! That is all Right! Festival season is nearly upon us (you can tell as it’s pissing down again and lad’s resembling prisoners or war are walking around with no tops on) and people are starting to become pretty giddy about the fourth coming ‘attractions’, but not everyone is full of the joys of summer … I was reading a blog the other day (traitor, I hear you say) by some fella called Will Hodgkinson who took his kids to a music festival … and, much to his displeasure and discomfort, spent all day in the ‘Kid’s Zone’. He went on to have a good old moan about not being able to see Leonard Cohen (I honestly can’t think why) as he had to spend his entire day watching some jaaag Punch and Judy routine and painting kid’s faces like tigers. Needless to say, he was rather pissed off Now, don’t get me wrong here as many of you avid readers of this Blog who have kids may want to instantly jump on my throat and start saying I’m ‘kid-ist’, which I’m not by the way but don’t you think this complete testicle could have saved himself the anxiety of having to sit around fifty screaming six year old kids by simply just not taking his kids to this music event? That’s what I’d have done that’s for sure! Another thing Mr Hodgkinson didn’t take into account is the fact that many of the major festivals (and some of the smaller ones) are mostly full of grown ups hell bent on having a hedonistic weekend fuelled by drink and drugs whilst listening to very loud music and laughing at people on stilts and getting seriously freaked-out. You could argue it’s an escape from reality, if you like? The people who do take kids away and get up to all of the above activities don’t really bother going to festivals anyway as that’s pretty much the norm for these parents of the year nominations (you’ll also find most of them live in Huyton village as well hanging around Home & Bargain buying shit Everton flags off that tithead who owns the stall there) but that’s another story I suppose? Now I don’t want to sound like a Daily Express Hack here or some sort of doom mongering ‘stiff’, but, in my opinion, there’s a time and place for taking kids to music venues and it’s usually when someone like The Saturdays or Girls Aloud are playing in the Echo Arena for example. And I also know that most people who go to music festivals aren’t exactly the type you see going to Christian Aid gatherings, WI weekends and church fetes! But are Glastonbury, The Isle of White & the V Festivals really the type of environment you want your kids to be in for the weekend? I know these places are hardly swarming with the likes of Myra Hindley or Purple Akey, but to be honest with you here I’d rather take my kids (if I had any) to a weekend away at Wally World with Ian Huntley as the tour guide. A long time ago (when people were still allowed to smoke in pubs) I used to have problems with kids being allowed in pubs as well as music venues for that reason, I still do in a certain way as pubs can be full of rather unpleasant characters (inside and outside) getting up to all kinds of naughty stuff. But the way I see it is if people want to mix having a good time whilst being in a nice friendly family environment I’d suggest a weekend away at your nearest Centre Parks instead of sitting in a field with a bunch of skunked-up hippies playing an out of tune guitar and eating warm lentils while taking serious amounts of mind-blowing acid all weekend!! And for the record, I also wouldn’t subject any child of any age to the music of Leonard Cohen either as that’s just way too cruel for ears of any age to have to put up with. Mr Hodgkinson (and Social Services): please take note Mol

Don't Believe Your Hype

A mate & I were talking in work last week about some mad stuff to do with urban myths and legends. And before you say anything, no, not all Civil Servants are as hard working as me. We were talking about Prince when he allegedly had a few ribs removed in order for him to suck his own tool. We also talked about the alleged story of Jimmy Saville participating in the odd bout of necrophilia so that he could spend some time in the hospital’s morgue he was doing charity work for. (not that I’ve ever witnessed it first hand, but I’m sure the sight of Jimmy Saville’s red tracky bottoms on the floor as his scrawny arse banged away at some corpse’s nether regions does not make a pleasant sight I can tell ye). Anyway, bizarre topics of conversation no doubt you are thinking, but it got me thinking about musicians who create their own ‘legend’ or ‘hype’ to secure their long lasting fame as let’s be honest here: most of them do talk utter fucking shit about themselves! Creating your own hype can sometimes, in a band’s quest towards the holy grail of ‘getting signed’, have half the battle won. Suede did it in the early nineties and Guns n Roses did it in the late eighties. Both bands released superb debut albums and both went onto become extremely influential in the British Indie Music Scene & American Rock scene respectively on the back of a pretty successful hype campaign. Both bands portrayed themselves as low life street urchins who lived on the darker side of the street, and it has to be said created a certain mystique about themselves prior to the release of their debuts. The results = massive sales cementing themselves in the music scene with unquestionable success in the business. Not bad for a band without a released record was it? But, hype doesn’t always work on your side and guarantee success. Does anyone ever remember a band from the mid nineties called Ultrasound? They never really made it big and never released an album, but at the time they had literally every record label in the land queuing up to sign them because of their hype. What I heard of them they were a pretty good band as they did release a few half decent singles. But after all the hoo har they created the cracks began to show in the band and most of the labels chasing after them with their chequebooks waving ferociously in the air began to lose interest and eventually tired of the chase and fucked them off. Ultrasound eventually signed to a tiny Indie label and disappeared off the radar completely (they’re probably working in some back street record shop now ala John Cusack in High Fidelity) either that or working at KFC Other notable ‘Hypesters’ include my favourite: the ever green Johnny Borrell. Ah, dear Johnny, what an utter bell end this daft little fop-haired man really is. I don’t think I’ve ever heard so much self gratifying drivel come out of one person’s mouth in my entire life. Rumour has it that he attempted to do a ‘prince’ and had a few of his lower ribs removed so he can suck his own cock as well!! Sadly Johnny has taken self belief just that bit too far as I (and many other people) think his band are utterly fucking wank!! I’d love to know who the A&R person was who signed him and his band and ask him if he has ever performed oral sex on Johnny! Although he would need to get his white spray on ball squeezers off first! It’s not just the ability to play music that can help the hype side of your band though. There is also the sexual conquests side. Do you often wonder why some many young girls & boys go to pop concerts? The answer is obviously sex appeal. Some women I work with are that obsessed with Take That you’d sometimes think they’re husbands never existed they way they talk. Now, I know their infatuation of the afore mentioned boy band (or are they now classed as a Dad Band?) has nothing to do with their musical ability, but has a lot to do with how wet they can get their thongs in the process of watching one of their videos or going to their concerts! Musicianship is well and truly out the window! The main fact here is that sex sells, and a lot of bands and singers who are not that well experienced between the sheets can sometimes fabricate the truth about their sexual conquests. Julio Double-Glazias once famously claimed to have ploughed three thousand women during the seventies & eighties. I have three words for the Spanish Crooner = My! Fucking! Arse! Justin Timberlake is another culprit of the so called kiss-and-tell singers. He started a rumour amongst the showbiz circuit that he’s got a cock like Roberto Carlos’ left thigh. Next thing you know he’s spotted hanging out the arses of Britney Spears & Cameron Diaz! Result!! Now, I’m not saying Mr Timberlake & Double-Glazias don’t have massive plonkers or haven’t rattled over three thousand birds, but the fact remains their stories have worked because if there is one thing certain about a star struck fan is that they will always be willing to find out if they are given the chance to jump in between the sheets with their favourite singer! At the end of the day they’re not gonna say no are they? Other types of hype bands chose to employ were the bad ass rock star hype. Take The Who for instance and the antics of their fruit-loop drummer Keith Moon. Don’t get me wrong, I used to love reading the stories of him driving his car into swimming pools & throwing home made bombs down hotel rooms bogs, but I just can’t help feel that most of it was bullshit. Of course, I’m pretty sure Moon was a nutcase, but I can’t help thinking that he was some how ‘egged on’ by the band’s management and his band mates in order to create headlines which, In turn, boosted the bands record sales and crowd attendance no doubt? The Stones were also pass maters at creating their own hype. In the sixties they were then managed by a guy called Andrew Loog Oldham. Every day he used to literally phone one of his journalist friends and together they would create a ‘Stones Headline’. EG: “would you let your daughter marry a Rolling Stone”? The Stones exploited the press in such a way many members of the public used to treat them like the great un-washed they portrayed themselves as and they were nearly barred from entering America at one stage because of these stories. Bet they wished they should have toned down the hype just a bit as things could have turned out pretty bad and very different indeed had they weren’t allowed in the states So, if your thinking about starting a new band but want to bypass all the bullshit, song writing, rehearsals and fast track your success, start a few rumours around the local music scene to say you’ve got a cock like a baby’s arm clutching a boiled heart and you’ve had your balls t-bagged by Mylene Klass. After that … the worlds your oyster, mate Mol

Stealing The Show

So, Coldplay deny they are thieves and plagiarists eh? I’ve just read a rather touching and heart felt interview with Coldplay drummer Colin Creed. Er, sorry, Will Champion where he countered claims from Yusuf Islam (he used to be Cat Stevens in case you didn’t know) that they had ripped off one of his songs ‘Foreigner Suite’ on their song Viva La Vida. Now, what really got on my tits about this is that the song really does sound like the Cat Stevens song and it is an exact rip off so why deny that it doesn’t sound like it? Are Coldplay currently in the transition period from music to politics? (I reckon Chris Martin secretly wears sock suspenders anyway) If so, I bet Bono is really becoming paranoid about them not just ripping off U2! One thing is for sure though: Coldplay do have a certain sound that seems very familiar, but they’re not alone. Many years ago in the early nineties Oasis were actually summonsed to court by the person who wrote the original music for a coke advert as it is an exact replica of ‘ShakerMaker’ off their debut album Definitely Maybe. If you have a listen to the Oasis song and are old enough to remember the coke song, you will see the similarities, but Oasis didn’t stop there, they went on to pretty much emulate everything The Beatles & John Lennon did from there on. If you don’t believe me, go and have a listen to The Soundtrack of Our Lives’ debut album, I guarantee you won’t believe your ears (or the truth, if you were Noel Gallagher) Some bands are actually quite honest when it comes to inadvertent plagiarism. The Verve admitted to using a sample from The Last Time by The Stones on the intro of their massive hit Bittersweet Symphony in the nineties. Now, who would think (apart from The Verve) that hey had used the exact same chords from The Last Time on ‘Bittersweet’? Not me, that’s for sure, but The Verve shot themselves in the foot BIG TIME as they ended up owing nearly 80% of the copyrights from ‘Bittersweet’ to Mick, Keef and the rest of the boys. You can picture the meeting now when five scruffs from Wigan turn up to meet The Stones: Ashcroft: “we’re gonna use some of your chords on this song, can we have permission to use them please Mr Jagger?” Mick: “sounds fuck all like it mate, but seeing as you’ve admitted it, sign here please” As regards blatant plagiarism, the way I see it, writing your own songs and creating your own sound is what makes a band truly original. I know it’s not really the easiest thing to do in the world of music as people do draw influences from their heroes and others including some established artists who are under pressure to release records, but at least give it a go at being original as I will guarantee you will be greatly admired more amongst your peers for doing so than ripping off someone else’s music. It also feels a hell of a lot better when you sit back and say “you know what? I wrote that!” Of course not everyone sets out with the intention of ripping off another song as it can happen by accident. As we all know there are only a small amount of chords for musicians to use after all, but serial offenders like Coldplay & Oasis are just kidding their fans by denying any wrong doing on their behalf and (in my opinion) in the process making themselves look like talent less knobheads who obviously don’t think twice about ripping someone off and letting their lawyers deal with the aftermath. What ever happened to respect your fellow musician? But going back to Will Champion and his closing comment on the subject was a quite superb point if you think about it: “One thing I’ve noticed about lawsuits is that they only get made public once a song becomes successful. Funny that isn’t it?” I’ll give the guy that one (even if he does look like Apollo) Mol

Strange Bedfellows

Mad week this week! Mainly been waiting for a certain gang of scumbags down the M62 to slip up and laughing my absolute cock off at another gang of scumbags chasing after a referee shouting “disgwace, disgwace”. Been pretty sick as well so I decided to have a look on the internet while I was off work for something to read as I had fuck all to do apart from sit on the couch watching shit day time telly and do a rather realistic impression of Regan from The Exorcist. As I plodded through the boring, predictable and sometimes tedious world of the Internet, I got reading a rather strange and interesting interview with Audioslave & Soundgarden singer Chris Cornell about how he has recently recorded an R ‘n’ B album with hip hop singer/producer Timberland. Now, I, and everyone else know that collaborations aren’t usually that rare in music, but the ones that are pretty bizarre do leave people (me included) scratching our heads in amazement, this one especially as you wouldn’t really associate Chris Cornell with R & B Music! In the afore mentioned interview Cornell spoke candidly about teaming up with Timberland and was drawing comparisons about what the two have them have done with Dylan in 1966 when he ‘turned electric’. Cornell went onto say he has received many hate mail letters from ardent Soundgarden fans saying stuff like “Dude! R ‘n’ B! What the fuck maaaan”. The fans do sound like a gang of dickheads as its obvious Cornell is spreading his wings as well as his creative boundaries so to speak, but I do feel a certain slight degree of sympathy towards them as it would be like Keith Richards downing tools with Mick & the boys and going on X Factor. Many Stones’ fans around the world would be scratching their heads at that prospect I’m sure. It’s not just Cornell & Timberland who have created this strange musical brew. You only have to look at David Bowie & Bing Crosby to see the most surreal of them all. The video (as well as the song) for Little Drummer Boy, in case you didn’t know, was set in someone’s living room during the festive period as it was released as a Christmas song with Dave & Bing standing in front of someone’s roaring fireplace (just like Tom Hicks doing one of his famous press interviews from home) with Bing holding a glass of sherry while Bowie looked on, pale as a sheet, with half of South America (get it) shovelled up his nose no doubt. It looked like the advert from years ago for Cueantrau with the smooth French fella standing next to the fire place like Michael Caine in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. Anyway, the song will always be remembered for the pure surreal feel to it, but the decorations were nice in the living room like, but I thought they could have at least made some ch – ch - ch – ch – changes. Anyway, my point here is obviously not to give you a history lesson of every bizarre duet in the history of popular music as that would be boring as fuck. But my opinion is when these bizarre partnerships do crop up I can’t help but think that the sole purpose for the two musicians in question doing such a thing is that one of them is massive and the other right on the bones of their arse as regards their popularity or albums sales. It’s a musical double edged sword. A win win franchise and, of course, shit loads of money guaranteed no matter what the quality of the music released. So, I’ve had my thinking cap on. This may not be the best of ideas, but, if your reading, why don’t The Zutons get knocking on Amy Winhouse’s door (if she’s up) and arrange a few re-makes of a couple of old classics? Winehouse isn’t writing at the minute as she’s proper on the lash showing her bee stings off to photographers in the Caribbean and The Zutons are doing fuck all apart from the odd spliff I reckon so why not give it a go? They’ve got fuck all left to lose and I’m sure they’re both pretty tired of hangin’ around. Hahaha (that’s the last of the shit jokes, I promise) Another brain wave I had the other days was without doubt the most surreal of partnerships, but perfectly logical if you think about it: The View & Rab C Nesbit. Both Scottish, both drunks, both scruffy fuckers and you can’t understand a single fucking word they are both saying!! Perfect if you ask me, although their shows would have to be limited to north of the border due to keeping their artistic integrity intact (if any presently exists, of course) and the audience having a good idea of what they’re singing about My final collaboration is more of a threesome to be honest (not like that though) which in my opinion should be turned into some sort of short musical film. It consists of Ross Kemp, The Taliban & Razorlight. Debut gig: Helmand Province (‘Hell Aid’, anyone?) Imagine the possibilities? Further more, imagine the carnage that would ensue if some of the tribal leaders got sight of Johnny Borrell’s skin tight white jeans as they burst into the opening bars of Golden Touch? Razorlight would no doubt meet their deaths at the hands of The Taliban and rid this world of their shite bile as Ross Kemp (or is it Russ?) would do his usual trick of shitting his kex and legging it with his camera crew back to his five star hotel! Murder? Action movie blockbuster on the way I reckon Mol

Little Shop of Honours

Jarvis Cocker = what a legend: Same glasses, same accent, same outlook on life, nothing but respect for the un-complicated former Pulp front man. If only there were more musicians like him. I was watching an interview with him the other day. He was talking about the demise of independent record shops and the rise of the download and commercialisation of the music industry in general. As ever, with Jarvis’ unique way of putting things, he had a few good points. My memory of independent record shops come from my youth when I used to bunk off school, go to town and hang around Probe or the Vynal Frontier. I used to love them old shops as you could find all kinds of stuff you wouldn’t find in the likes of HMV or Virgin (including the smell of joss sticks and stale Rush). The disappearance of these shops has, in my opinion, taken away the personal experience we used to have when buying our music as opposed to the much more corporate feeling we have now. Everything is too ‘hands on’ and extremely sensationalised these days to the extreme that pop stars are doing signed appearances in the ‘Mega Stores’ all the time just to make sure they can bank on your money. I see it as nothing more than shameless capitalism. Even supermarkets sell music these days, but have you noticed the way they advertise music more than actual music stores? They even have them bizarre prices of £9.97 or £8.56 per CD. I’d love to know where they get them prices from and how much salary the person who came up with that idea actually receives. £118.567 per annum? £9.97 per hour? Anyone? Compare the corporate, shiny, clean, massive stores of today to the likes of Probe & others and there is an absolute world of difference. I used to remember fondly walking into Probe looking for something and being directed straight to it by some 6ft hippy that looked like Neil from The Young Ones who had a bad ‘Billy Ocean’ problem wearing a Sisters of Mercy t-shirt. After that he’d sit down at his stool behind the desk he ‘worked at’, carried on reading the Socialist Worker whilst listening to Gram Parsons, smoking a roley and basically left you alone to get on with your shopping. Superb, hassle free music shopping that always guaranteed your custom again and again. The only conversation you have in mega stores these days with people behind the counter is when they ask you if you have a store card or wish to purchase any of the shit books or CD’s they can’t sell! There are still a few that exist today (by the skin of their teeth) in Liverpool, Hairy Records being my all time favourite. During my time in the band I used to do a bit of fly-postering around town and I always used to target record shops. The fella in Hairy Records always used to take a vested interest in the gig we had coming up and he always seemed genuinely interested in how your band was doing. It was a nice personal touch that was usually shunned by the ‘bigger’ stores who were more likely to tell you to fuck off or faced being thrown out (head first) by their steroid-ridden beefcake security guard. A world of difference wouldn’t you agree? Another thing Jarvis went onto comment on was recommendations you get imposed upon you when buying music on-line. Now, I know everyone always mentions new albums to your mates and all that, but I actually find it rather creepy the way some of these website you buy your music from tell you what they recommend and what other people bought who you may be ‘interested in buying’. I-Tunes do something similar as well. I find it pretty patronising to just pigeon hole people in this way. You don’t need to be ushered to a certain type of music just because someone else bought it! You’re not at a fucking wedding are you? It’s all too creepy and treating people like sheep and it had to be said gets on my nerves!! You expect treatment like that from the Two Kenneth’s from The Fast Show. You can picture the scene: “Ooh, Led Zeppelin, Sir, Ooh, ooh, suits you Sir” (2nd Kenneth appears from behind the ‘Rock Section’) “Your wife, Sir, does she like a good shuffle, Sir? Does she like to ‘mix it up’, Sir, does she like it AC/DC Sir, ooh suits you sir, suits you” Imagine going to get your weekly shopping and some salesman type person comes up behind you and starts offering you a certain type of butter because you look like the last person who bought it? You’d be pretty fucking dumbfounded and damn right angry wouldn’t you? The final step would obviously being targeted in a sex shop. God knows what they’d offer me? Black twenty inch double ender? Fuck knows! Now, I know this is a Music Blog, but I can’t help but speak out against this here as I have to get it off my chest. Music is your personal taste. It’s not about what Bob Bloggs and his wife who live in the next street bought. It’s about what you want and what you like! Wouldn’t it be interesting if you were given a private audience with say: Richard Branson and told him what to buy when thinking about buying a new sports car or a new yacht? “Er, try this brand new £100.000 Ferrari Enzo, Sir Richard, I think you’d look great in it”. Somehow I don’t think he’d appreciate your advice too much even though he’s making an absolute killing out of some ‘slick’ marketing ploy aimed at people like me & you designed to recommend something we might like So I’d like to end this fittingly with a few words from good old Jarvis and one of Pulp’s classic songs ‘Common People’: “I met her in a supermarket …” Now, just imagine here, I wonder if Jarvis ever thought about following that line with “she ‘recommended’ that I had to start it somewhere … so we started it … In Virgin’s Mega Store“ Somehow, I seriously doubt it (it doesn’t rhyme for a start) So, remember this, pop pickers: obey your ears, not some corporate slag bag who wants to bleed your wallet dry for the sake of his multi trillion pound corporation. Get out there to an independent record shop and buy something that tweaks your ears … steer clear of the 6ft Smelly Hippy though. Mol

All Killer, No Filler

I was having a bit of a text marathon with a musically learned mate of mine last week (don’t worry, it was nothing bent). We were talking about under rated albums, and it got me thinking about the bands that have quality by the bucket load, bands who have never released a shit album. Controversy, I hear? Now, I know everyone has different tastes when it comes to music and one man’s shit is another man’s perfection. I even know some people who own S Club 7 Albums! I also had a conversation the other day with some bird about how shit she reckons Franz Ferdinand are. This same person also thinks Razorlight are a superb band. We all know where I stand on that issue so you probably don’t need to know what my reply was. So this only proves the myth that everyone does have different tastes. I have an old saying: If we all liked the same thing I’m sure it would be a pretty dull place to live. I’ll always stand by this, but this Blog is also about personal opinion. That’s the main reason I write it. Now, we all know most bands have a ‘Tin Machine’ moment, but the bands that do usually release the quality records are the ones that take their time writing, producing and releasing them at the exact right moment (usually when their competition are winding up their last album/tour cycle). They are usually the bands who aren’t too scared to put two fingers up to the pushy records executives and say “fuck you! We’ll record and release this in our own time” – That, I greatly admire in any band. Maybe it is the time difference between each of their albums or maybe it is down to that fact that they are immensely talented musicians and very clever songwriters who know the difference between all killer and no filler. Or is there a lack of bands who are genuinely interested in writing quality music that they actually do care about or are there far too many bands interested in the life style of a rock star and the celebrity that comes with it as most people might agree here that the possibility of throwing one up Kate Moss is pretty great if you become a member of a vaguely successful band? And an appealing one as well. But, the sad fact is that there are a lot of shit bands who will write anything to appeal to the masses and write and album full of pub sing a long songs (The Fratelis, The Enemy, Kaiser Chiefs, Oasis, etc, etc – just a few examples in my opinion) and will not use their possible short time in music to treat what they are releasing and writing with respect but spend it on doing long tours and far too many festival appearances to fill their coffers. I did make a point before about personal taste, but in my opinion I would say there are maybe four bands that have never made a bad album during their time in music, they are: The Killers (Hot Fuss, Sam’s Town, Day & Age)

Arcade fire (Funeral, Neon Bible)

Queens of the Stone Age (Rated R, Songs for the Deaf, Lullabies to Paralyze, Era Vulgaris)

Pavement (Slanted and Enchanted, Crooked Rain Crooked Rain, Wowee Zowee, Brighten the Corners, Terror Twilight) Many of the above bands will not seem recognisable or even relevant to many of the people reading this Blog, but if you think about it, many of them are considered hugely influential in the many genres of music they represent in the present day and at the time of their circulation. Pavement are one of the greatest American alternative bands to come out of the nineteen nineties ‘left of the dial’ era, Queens on the Stone Age represent the crème de la crème of the so called Nu-Metal scene (I still prefer to call it Rock Music though), The Killers are the modern day Pet Shop boys with guitars who have fans right across the board and Arcade Fire are considered in many quarters of the music press to be the greatest band on the planet. If you come round to my house at any given day I’m sure you’ll find one of the above albums being played. Just make sure you give us a bell first as I might have my Speedos on while sitting in the garden with the missus. Now, I know a lot of you reading this will probably be shaking your head in disarray now and saying “he’s forgot about these” or “he’s forgot about them” or “what about my favourite band blah blah”, I can totally understand. Honestly I can, but I’m not an agony aunt, so go and take your moaning to someone who gives a shit! haha, kidding. But, seriously, there are another type of band that have never released a bad album, they are the one hit wonders. And I know what a certain G Roberts of Skelmersdale, Merseyside (haha) will be thinking: the La’s. The La’s are the most notable of bands that fall into the category of one hot wonders (don’t worry, that will be the last time I say that as I find the term extremely annoying as well). The making and release of their album (The La’s) was shrouded in mystery and was the stuff of urban myths. It was eventually ‘forced out’ by their label Go Discs in the early 90’s after they allegedly finally ran out of patience with Lee Mavers’ after many years of recording demos and his bizarre insistence of having ‘60’s dust’ inside his Vox amp! (again; allegedly) Mavers, though, was a very talented songwriter, but sadly bordered on being a floored genius with an obsession with perfectionism which eventually resulted in The La’s never releasing anything ever again. Damn shame if you ask me as I grew up listening to The La’s and, being from Huyton, getting to know some of them (ouch my foot!)* The same could be said about Guns N Roses’ most recent release Chinese Democracy even though it was not a debut they did take a hell of a long time to release an album. The Sex Pistols are another band that fall into this category after releasing Never Mind the Bollocks in 1978. Of course they had no choice as to release a follow up as they had a couple of small issues such as fighting, drugs, contractual issues, major implosion and the suicide of Sid Vicious to deal with. However ‘Bollocks’ is still the benchmark for many up and coming punk rock bands even today. As is The La’s debut with many Indie bands and Appetite for Destruction was without doubt one of the finest rock albums of all time. *name dropping can sometimes hurt your foot. So, if you have no patience for bands who release an album with two good singles and a load of filler tracks and you wanna take some musical advice from yours truly (go on, just this once, please), get onto some of the above list and use them vouchers you got for crimbo that are still burning a hole in you sky rocket. Mol

Not So Smashing Pumpkin

I’ve just finished reading a rather bizarre and desperate interview with the soul remaining original member of Smashing Pumpkins: Billy Corgan. In his latest incarnation of the Pumpkins he has decided that if fans of the band want to subscribe to the band’s Blog, they must pay him fifty dollars. Hardly the best carrot & stick initiative a band (of the No Spring chicken variety) has come up with wouldn’t you agree? To be honest with you I can’t really see that many of even their die-hard fans signing up to this as it sounds like the last acts of a desperate man trying for one last bumper pay day before he’s sent to the rock star nursing home (or as it’s known in this country: Butlins) Now, everyone who reads this Blog knows were I stand when it comes to greed in music, but I can’t help but get the feeling Corgan and his financial advisors (they used to be called Managers a long time ago) have been watching too many news stories about the collapse of the world’s financial system or too many episodes of The Apprentice and sat down to think about a new ‘initiative’ or ‘strategy’ to rip their fans with. Looks like they haven’t done their home work to be honest as I wouldn’t even see anyone with the lowest IQ in the entire world signing up for this shit he’s trying to pull. Idiot! Who the fuck does he think he is? Donald Trump? It seems capitalism hasn’t just gripped the western world, but it seems to have gripped the music world as well. I mean, I’m no Mike Baldwin, but I know the difference between something that is value for money and a complete rip off. Sadly, in Corgan’s case, watching some fella potter around in a studio making demos and having his photo taken is not worth $50. I could spend less in a Brass House in Amsterdam and have a much better time to be honest! Stick to the music, Bill. If not, I have only tow words for you: You’re fired!! Mol