Back in the Saddle

Many of you avid readers of Mol’s Sound Words may have noticed my absence from the rather murky world of internet blogging of late! The truth is I’ve been busier than Ryan Giggs at a family party!

As well as having to plan my forthcoming wedding, trying stop my nearest and dearest friends from skinning my arse bald on my stag night and having to endure the possibility of having to work somewhere else than my home town, I’m also back in the saddle of the music world!

Watch out kids, The Outriders are coming to a town near you!

A few months back Mart, Ben, Stuart, Me and Dr Mark Slade MBE made a decision to form a new super group from Huyton’s finest musicians and do a few decent covers and the truth is over the last few months we have a had a fucking ball!

Being together again and practicing in Crash not only breaks up what can a pretty boring normal working week, but gives you a true sense of male camaraderie.

Taking the piss out of each, ripping each other, putting up with the contents of my arse and having a general good laugh is a lot less hassle and ten times more enjoyable than being in an original band and the hassles that come with that (writing songs, choosing what songs to do, etc, etc).

Basically the whole vibe is better and the songs come quicker as everybody knows them! It’s just then down to the case of how good you actually perform them and the truth is that we actually are pretty fucking good

As yet, we haven’t done any gigs, but we’ll soon be ready to play. Just need two or three more songs and we’re all yours. Numerous venues have been mentioned and the possibility of seeing us play before I am wed is a very good one!

So, next time you’re out and you see a bunch of slightly old fellas playing covers in a pub and it doesn’t exactly ‘float your boat’, don’t just dismiss them and think “they’re fucking shit” or “silly arld bastards, go and put ye slippers on and smoke ye pipe”– take into account that they are a bunch of fellas doing what they enjoy = having fun

That is, and should be, the way of all things

Mol

Smart Arses or Tight arses?

This week sees the much anticipated release of the new album by the Kaiser Chiefs called The Future is Medieval! ... Yawn!

But, I may have to hold back the “yawns” here as there’s a bit of a catch to it by our smart arse Indie popsters as it’s quite unique in the way that there has been no advertising or promotion in the run up to the release for the album at all. There’s also another interesting factor to this album

When you go on line (to the Kaiser’s own website, of course) to buy the album, the consumer is given the option to buy (rather bizarrely) ten songs from the choice of twenty for the princely sum of £7.50

Then, once you’ve created your ‘playlist’ the website then gives you the option to create your own album cover. It’s like a mix between Play School and an ipod

Bargain? I don’t think so

Although it does come across as being a bit of a smart arse idea from an ever changing industry, it also wreaks of being yet another gimmick from what sounds like another desperate attempt to boost sales and interest in a band struggling to come to terms with what to do with their money (they bought their own studio in case you were wondering)

But, the implications of the latest round of “my ideas is better than yours” in the ever competitive fields of Indie music could well be taking things to promote your new album just that little bit too far in my opinion

What next?

· Guess the title of the album?

· Guess the title of the song?

· Make up your own song/album title?

· Name the band?

· Name the band members?

But, I’m afraid the Kaisers have had their parades well and truly pissed on as a few weeks prior to the release of The Future is Medieval (which no one was supposed to know about) some naughty internet hacker leaked the album on line for the whole world to listen to and the Kaisers hopes of creating a totally unique way of releasing album were well and truly fucked! Bugger!

So, what happened next: That’s right, they did an interview and started kicking up a massive fuss about how people who leak albums are wrecking the music of music (bullshit) and, of course the real reason they are so pissed off is that they are losing their hard earned money from people obtaining the album for free courtesy of some geeky hacker called Derek who spends all day in his bedroom/loft conversion wanking off over series 6 of Doctor Who and of course finding ways to download albums that haven’t been released yet

On a person note, if I were in a very successful band like the Kaiser Chiefs, if I wanted to release a secret album, I’d certainly go the very extreme measures to make sure the likes of ‘Derek’ didn’t get his grubby little hands on it and invest a lot of my hard earned money to prevent that happening!

So, instead of thinking up such elaborate ways to release an album and thus guaranteeing applause and all-round pats on the back from your smart arse geeky mates, I’d suggest you look more into guaranteeing your future releases are NOT leaked on-line for the whole world to listen to and NOT to buy as frankly it’s not big and it’s not clever!

Either that or I predict a riot!

Mol

Mad For It? Calm Down Lad!!

I don’t know about you, but I’m fucking sick to the back teeth of hearing about all things Manchester lately! (Sorry Neil)

So, being a true Scouser, I’ve decided to sit as (bias) judge and jury on the matter. Maybe its sour grapes about the recent footballing achievements of our ‘friends’down the M62, but when I spout my shit compared to Lord Ferg and his Pet Rat Neville, it ,makes me feel so much better about the city I love and proud of loving

I was watching a documentary the other day about Manchester music and, like most programmes about music on BBC4, it was pretty good

Now, to be brutally honest with you here, after watching the above programme, I really don’t see what all the hoo haa was about the Manchester music scene of the early nineties! Some was good, and some was utter rank!

The more ‘famous’ bands such as The Happy Mondays and The Stone Roses were more (in my opinion) a glorified cabaret band! – don’t worry, I’m not gonna mention Oasis in this Blog (for a change)

I always thought the more creditable Manchester bands were the likes of Massive Attack, Inspiral Carpets, The Charlatans* and The Fall. They had a lot more class in the way they were and the way the crafted their songs!

*I know The Charlatans were from Knutsford or some other ‘outer-wool’ area, but their music certainly fitted the style of Manchester for the time

But, what really got my goat about the programme was one thing – where was the programme about music from Liverpool???????

Liverpool has always had a fine music past obviously famous throughout the world, so why did the BBC decide to celebration about our lovely neighbours? Where’s our programme celebrating Liverpool music?

Liverpool’s two main bands of the nineties were without doubt Space & Cast. Not everyone’s cup of tea, but they did come up with some decent pop tunes for the time with (the exception of Space) some superb guitar licks that still makes the hairs stand on end to this day!

Manchester music, in my opinion, always lived in the past I thought: Candy Flip, The Charlatans and Inspiral Carpets always used to mimic the sixties freak-out era with over the top psychedelic videos with trippy lyrics “can you dig it” being an example of the typical hippy idealism from The Mock Turtles. As for the shaking of their bowl heard haircuts – I think the less said about that the better!

I always felt the lyrics and music approach in general from the likes of Space and Cast had a more gritty edge to it. Take the lyrics of ‘Neighbourhood’ by Space for an example. Highly fictional, of course, but strangely eerie and a little bit ‘odd’ “he’s a local vicar and a serial killer”

The La’s also portrayed a certain degree of ‘rough n ready’ with their lyrics about suburban boredom and the realities of drug use in a poverty-driven society. Pretty grim I’m sure most people would agree. Compare this to the rather glorified and ‘nice’ use of drugs by The Happy Mondays and The Inspiral Carpets and you’ll notice the world of difference.

Liverpool music tended to tell the truth about drugs, Manchester covered it over and over-glorified it! Hardly romantic, but very very true to the sense those drugs actually were bad, not good!

(Compare: Can You Dig It by The Mock Turtles to Failure/Doledrum by The La’s for a point of reference)

Manchester also coined the phrase “the summer of love”. What complete and utter bollocks!

I was a young man in the early nineties/late eighties and I can guarantee there wasn’t much “love” around in the north of England ate the time (especially in Liverpool). Anyone who had the naivety to actually believe should have had a look at the size of their bell bottoms at the time and thought “shit! I really did too many garys”

As for anthems, Manchester’s ‘flag ship’ anthem was without doubt Live Forever by Oasis. But, as Oasis proved some many times during their illustrious career they (and their songs) were not original. As for the song it self being an anthem for the nineties was it really or a glorified sound track to a cocky coke head’s lifestyle? (Mimicked by their lead singer no doubt)

Now, I know this all may sound like a rather partisan opinion towards my home town, which I am extremely proud of by the way, but I think pride in ones city is not a crime. The only crime I feel being committed is by the programme makers who are obviously showing a certain degree of biasness towards Manchester

Finally, Manchester’s greatest achievement in music has to be five young chaps who started life as glorified strippers and ended their careers as glorified camp strippers

I think you know who I’m talking about?

Take that and stick it in your pipe and smoke it, Manchester

Mol

Come Back, Baby Come Back!

So, The Icicle Works have announced a 30^th anniversary concert! What a crock of shit!

Has anyone else failed to notice that for a large chunk of the thirty years, The Icicle Works have NOT been together? Maybe they should have called it the 30^th Anniversary (with a bit if a gap in the middle because we split up as we hated each other quite a lot Tour)

Once again, as most of my readers will know, I hate all this money spinning bullshit about bands re-forming!

A few weeks back I was watching Sky Arts and they had a programme on about Duran Duran. They too were also celebrating their thirty-something years ‘together’.

But, during the inevitable boring arse-kissing interview afterwards they never once mentioned the stories about their fights and inevitable break up! And, as the whole subject of this Blog is about – the large gap they had in the wilderness not writing, playing or touring together was the main topic of the interview! All very nice and all very savvy (to guarantee people go to the gigs and buy the album no doubt?)

All they talked about was “getting back on the road” and taking their “great new songs” to their fans (that will never ever come close to the quality of their mid-eighties hits by the way). What they did talk about was the “good times” they had with their model girlfriends and other celebrity “friends”. How very fake!

So, why is it these bands call these comebacks anniversaries? It’s probably a bit along the lines of the culture we have in this country to simply re-name a thing that has become tedious and unsavoury.

The one band I used to have a lot of respect for was The Sex Pistols until they did their ‘reunion’ a few years back. Asked why they were doing it, John Lydon snarled “well we’re not doing it because we like each other, we don’t, and we actually hate each other! We’re only doing it for one thing - the money!” In a rather bizarre way I kind of I admired Lydon for saying that. He was hardly like Simon Le Bon Bon and his nice, sweet answers about his bezzy mates he shares a band with! Then again, the less said about Lydon and his Country Life Butter commercials ………

Recently, some of you may well know that I’ve re-joined the band with Stu, Mart and Ben. We have also recruited the services of a good mate of mine called Dr Mark Slade (who also does Gynaecology part-time)

Now, during our lengthy career together many years ago, we played well over one hundred gigs and released a good few half decent demos. You could say we had a pretty good acceptable slice of success for a band that was never signed to a record label. So, when we decided to get back together (albeit to sing cover versions as the slightly balding hairlines, grey hair and beer guts aren’t really appealing to many record labels these days) we didn’t call it a reunion or an anniversary! We just did it! Simple as that

So, why can’t these bands like Duran Duran and Icicle Works simply just announce that they’re getting back together instead of calling it a bleeding anniversary or a reunion? While their also at it maybe they could take a leaf out of John Lydon’s book and admit their real reasons for getting back together and tell us its simply for the money as to be brutally honest here: anniversaries are celebrations of certain events like weddings or birthdays.

I don’t think they should apply to bands getting back together

And finally the less said about a certain Dad Band from Manchester who has recently re-employed the services of a fat dancer the better!

Ch-ching!

Mol

The Re-Birth of the Independent Music Shops

Every now and again a little off-the-radar story pops up that makes you do one of the rather embarrassing actions involving a clenched fist with a scrunched up face followed by a “YES” – this is one of them stories

Independent Record Stores have sadly been on the decline over the last decade. This is mainly due to the rise of the rather ridiculously named Music Mega Store. The like of HMV and Virgin have basically monopolised high street music sales since the birth of (what I call) Uber Commerce. The Independent Record Shop hasn’t had a look in and many shops were forced to close … until now

I remember a few years ago many of you avid readers may remember a Blog I did about the smelly record stores of old in Liverpool from the likes of Probe to Hairy Records and my personal favourite The Vynal Frontier.

The good news is now they are back on the rise!

I loved these shops and most of all I loved the casual approach from the ‘staff’ who worked there. But most of all I loved their knowledge of music. You really could ask them anything and without searching the mega computer that many staff at Virgin or HMV had to rely on to see if a certain record was in stock they’d know off the top of their head!

I always thought how amazing it was to have such memory about music as it was clearly obvious they had been smoking copious amounts of weed whilst reading a copy of The Socialist Worker behind the counter for a good eight hours!

The article I was reading also had a superb quote from Spencer Hickman, founder of Rough Trade Records and the person behind UK Independent Record Store Day:

"People are waking up to the fact that all towns across the country are becoming identikit, and the small indie retailers are disappearing. They don't want this anymore and are finally saying 'No, enough is enough'."

Mr Hickman also came out with a quote that, again, made me feel very proud to be a listener or good music:

"People across the board are now fed up with the music coming from television shows

How ‘on the money’ he was with that quote! (After reading this it was when I did the clenched fist!)

I know there is still a hell of a long way to go for Independent Record Store as the industry (if you can call it that) has been badly damaged by the recession and of course the ever changing way people now ‘buy’ their music, but the (very) early signs really are good.

Green shoots are appearing and the possible re-birth of the small record shop is on the rise, but (and it’s a big but) they must also slightly change their ways if they are to remain in competition with ‘the big boys’ and get people back in through the door.

Another thing that also brought a smile to my face was the consumer research carried out by people who actually bought CD’s compared to the buying of random ‘hit’ songs. Again, as I previously Blogged about, this will once again promote the fruits of listening to a whole album instead of the ones that had a hit video to it!

Now I’m not saying the small Indie Music Shops should suddenly have to sell their souls to Lucifer and turn into corporate slags and greet customers with a cheesy smile followed by “how can I help you today?” and finish with “would you like one of our store cards? Ok, you have a nice day now”, but they will certainly have to innovate and re-engage with the public who will obviously be used to dealing with above plastic clones who know more about fake tans and thongs than Led Zep III and Creedence Clearwater Revival.

So, next time your out and about in town and your missus is in Primark buying a multi-pack of budgie smugglers for your uncle knobhead’s birthday, try your best to slope off for half an hour to your local Independent Music Shop, chat to the hippy shop assistant about the best of Sly Stone, have a friendly chat and a laugh …

… And skin up!

Mol

The Misguided Strokes of Genius

Pardon the pun, but whatever happened to The Strokes?

Cast your mind back ten years to 2001 when an album was released by an unknown New York band called The Strokes. The album was called ‘Is This It’ and it has to be said – was one of the finest debuts I’ve ever heard. I still listen to it today as it’s still that good

The Strokes had it all, good looks, celebrity girlfriends, style and most of all – they could play! They could really play! The chord structure alone on their songs were superb (I should know as we cover a version of ‘Last Nite’)

Is This It created a new wave of cool across the music world and everyone wanted a piece of The Strokes. Sad thing, they did! Implosion (probably caused by drugs, alcohol and other excesses that go with the rock star life style that they became so fond of) happened and the sad, predictable spiral out of control came like a bolt!

Now, take the clock forward from 2001 ten years and another three albums later to 2011 and The Strokes have released ‘Angels’, and it has to be said here, it’s a pretty tame effort

But, The Strokes have done what they have done with all three albums that have followed ‘Is This It’ with ‘Room on Fire’, ‘First Impressions of Earth’ and ‘Angels’ – they have released a killer single before releasing a pretty drab album.

Take Whatever Happened off Room on Fire, You Only Live Once off First Impressions of Earth and, the latest song Under cover of Darkness off Angels -= they are all very very impressive songs!

Maybe it’s a marketing ploy (as I have previously Blogged about) by were their management have pushed them for one superb single, release that, wet the appetites of their adoring public, guarantee pre-orders into the millions and release a shit album.

All of this equals one thing of course = money in the bank followed by a tour that contains a selection of their earlier (better) hits to appease their fans at their gigs.

To be honest, this really does (if it’s true or course) disappoint me as, without making them appear like Nobel Peace Prize nominees here, I thought The Strokes possess integrity and intellect and most of all – they cared about what they released

Seems I’m wrong as the evidence is in the selection of album fillers the band have released since Is This It

A quite appropriately named album if there ever was such a thing

Mol

Birds Might Fly but the Cameras Never Lie

Been listening to a lot of Jefferson Airplane this week just for a bit of a change and one thing really struck me about them – the female singer in the band Grace Slick has got one of the most outstanding voices I’ve ever had the pleasure to hear!

So, in comparison to a lot of today’s female offerings, it got me thinking: what makes a decent female vocalist?

Much has been documented lately with regards to the female vocalist from this country and beyond. To be perfectly honest, if you put them all together in a room and got them to sing the same song, I really don’t think you could tell the difference between them! That also goes for the subject of most their songs as well (it’s usually about some sort of marriage break up or broken heart), and if you think about it, it’s pretty fucking pathetic!

Take my mate the lovely Cheryl “Ah luv ye” Cole for example. England’s New Queen of Hearts (replacing Diana) has made a career out of being seen as ‘the victim’ after her rather pathetic and damn right embarrassing marriage to a certain footballer (who earns way in excess of one hundred grand a week might i add)

Now a days female vocalists have several pampered fingers in several pies including TV work, fashion advertising and of course reality TV programmes! Add to that their ability to play on the heart strings of the nation by ‘exposing’ their insecurities and vulnerabilities equals, in my opinion, a pretty sad and pathetic money making machine that sadly a lot of people believe! You only have to watch an episode of Piers Morgan’s (fake) Life Stories for example!

Other things that really gets my back up (and I’m gonna be pretty controversial here) are female vocalists who ‘play’ on their illness. Cheryl Cole’s Malaria aside here take Kylie Minogue’s Cancer scare for example. Now, don’t get me wrong here as I’m not being horrible, but the amount of sympathy that flooded in for the Little Aussie was pretty un-needed in my opinion as I’m sure she has the rather perfect amount of money to obtain the best cancer treatment money can buy! Compare that to the thousands of people living in a working class city in the north of England who can’t afford the same health care Ms Minogue had and the difference is amazing! The level of sympathy is also amazing if you think about it!

And, seeing as I’m in full moaning mode here, why do so many female vocalists these days insist on marrying or going out with someone who is also famous?

Why can’t the likes of Katy Perry or Beyoncè Knowles seek the affections of a normal run of the mill chap of working class creed? Be great wouldn’t it? Imagine turning up for a bevy in The Crofters on Saturday night with say Katy Perry or Pixie Lott and bragging that your gonna be ‘hangin’ out of their arse’ when you get home? A visit to The Gold Star would be swiftly jibbed off for the quickest taxi in Huyton!

Now, if you compare most of the above to the likes of Grace Slick from Jefferson Airplane, Janis Joplin and, to a certain extent, Tina Turner. These were strong women who would command their audience and make them sit up, take note, and listen to what they had to sing about instead of people reading about it in OK or Hello magazine!

In other words – they concentrated and focused on one thing and one thing only = being a singer! Not being famous or selling their story to some Red Top or celebrity gossip magazine just so they could squeeze and extra million into their already over-stuffed bank account!

Now I’m not saying all female vocalists should suddenly turn into alcoholic drug addicts with a tendency for under arm hair that would put a Russian Javelin thrower to shame, but I think a small slice of in-decency and a small dose of ‘the street’ is actually quite attractive in a woman and shows they actually care more about what music they release instead of how they look!

As for that rather important point of most of them to actually possess the ability to sing – that’s a totally different matter as it’s certainly not gonna happen in my lifetime anyway!

Prepare the world for a lifetime of Female Vocal Monotony!

Mol